The Man of Principle

During a shower of rain, the Keeper of a zoological garden observed a Man of Principle crouching beneath the belly of an ostrich, which had drawn itself up to its full height to sleep.

"Why, my dear sir," said the Keeper, "if you fear getting wet, you'd better creep into the pouch of yonder female kangaroo—the Saltarix Mackintosha—for if that ostrich wakes, he will kick you to death in a minute."

"I can't help that," the Man of Principle replied, with that lofty scorn for practical considerations that distinguishes his kind. "He may kick me to death if he wishes, but until he does, he shall give me shelter from the storm. He has swallowed my umbrella."